


dangerously having the time of our lives

by Fiction_is_the_Truth



Series: the gods are different (resurrection is involved) [3]
Category: Magnus Chase and the Gods of Asgard - Rick Riordan, Percy Jackson and the Olympians & Related Fandoms - All Media Types, The Kane Chronicles - Rick Riordan
Genre: Chatting & Messaging, Crack, Crack Treated Seriously, Gen, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Updates Sporadically, Yikes, and also, chat fic, dont worry, have fun, if someone’s up there they show up at least a few times, im just vibing over here, is likely, thats a lot of character tags, this is not meant to be taken seriously
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-11
Updated: 2021-02-14
Packaged: 2021-03-03 19:01:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,159
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24670492
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fiction_is_the_Truth/pseuds/Fiction_is_the_Truth
Summary: Leo Valdezinviteskingofnewyork, itssuperman, barnacleboy, galaxybrain, givemeyourbones, sadiethegreat,and 13 others to the chat.Leo Valdezhas changed their name tobadboysupremebadboysupreme:welcome to the chaosSeveral people are typing…
Series: the gods are different (resurrection is involved) [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1512896
Comments: 11
Kudos: 70





	1. so you want a to start a war?

**Author's Note:**

> This should be fun.
> 
> Each chapter will read as a sort of stand alone one-shot. Context probably isn’t necessarily needed, but if you feel like it, check out the first two works in the series.
> 
> Title is again from Valerie Broussard’s Trouble. Chapter title is from Start A War by Klergy.
> 
> Please enjoy this nonsense.

**_Leo Valdez_ ** _ invites  _ **_kingofnewyork, itssuperman, barnacleboy, galaxybrain, givemeyourbones, sadiethegreat,_ ** _ and 13 others to the chat. _

**_Leo Valdez_ ** _ has changed their name to  _ **_badboysupreme_ **

**badboysupreme:** welcome to the chaos

_ Several people are typing… _

**galaxybrain:** leo what is the purpose of this???

**givemeyourbones:** we don’t need another group chat

**givemeyourbones:** im already in like 5

**givemeyourbones:** against my will, i might add

**kingofnewyork:** amature, im in at least 10

**barnacleboy:** awww, nico! i thought you loved us!

**givemeyourbones:** debatable

**barnacleboy:** :[ 

**barnacleboy:** im wounded

**galaxybrain:** im pretty sure you’re fine

**givemeyourbones:** also how did you even get my contact info

**givemeyourbones:** i definitely didnt give it to you

**badboysupreme:** blame jason 

**itssuperman:** sorry nico 

**sadiethegreat:** not that this isnt entertaining...

**sadiethegreat:** but why am i here 

**sadiethegreat:** i recognize **@galaxybrain** (nice new name btw) but who are the rest of y’all 

**badboysupreme:** i thought it would be cool to invite as many people possible from that meet up we had

**badboysupreme:** (because wow, you guys were fun!) 

**badboysupreme:** you gave me your number sadie, but sadly none of your friends did, and so did alex 

**badboysupreme:** speaking of,  **@coolguysdontlookatexplosions** , where you at?

**coolguysdontlookatexplosions:** hello peasants 

**coolguysdontlookatexplosions:** thank you leo, for an excellent opportunity, i vibe with this chaos 

**theVibeChecker:** alex did you rope us into this? 

**coolguysdontlookatexplosions:** welcome to the chaos  **@Maggie, @mr.president, @merida, @theROCK, @magicman, @fashionman**

**Maggie:** ALEX PLEASE STOP CHANGING MY NAME 

**coolguysdontlookatexplosions:** :) :) :)

**merida:** ill fix it 

**_sadiethegreat_ ** _ is typing.... _

**Maggie:** NO!

**_merida_ ** _ has changed  _ **_Maggie_ ** _ ’s name to  _ **_rapunzel_ **

**rapunzel:** yeah… that’s worse

**_rapunzel_ ** _ has changed their name to  _ **_moralsupport_ **

**mr.president:** i hate to say it magnus, but youre … not very good at that 

**moralsupport:** tru, but i AM good at yelling at you to not die

**moralsupport:** and sometimes it even works! and then i get to heal your asses before you go off to get yourself killed again!

**theROCK:** when you put it like that, it does make sense 

**doctorman:** **@moralsupport** are you also a healer?

**moralsupport:** yes. i cannot fight well, so i make sure everyone else doesnt die 

**doctorman:** i feel you, i also have to wrangle idiots on a regular business 

**givemeyourbones:** i resent that remark 

**doctorman:** then STOP DOING STUPID THINGS 

**barnacleboy:** ha! 

**doctorman:** this applies to you too, percy. annabeth will vouch for me 

**barnacleboy:** ok fine, i do make less than sensible decisions sometimes, thats fair 

**kingofnewyork:** if you and jason will stop challenging each other to duels maybe we wouldn’t have this problem

**galaxybrain:** i second that motion 

**barnacleboy:** why do you wound me so???

**galaxybrain:** if you and thalia could stop that too, that’d be great 

**barnacleboy:** yeah no

**ispeakforthetrees:** yeah annie, thats not gonna happen

**barnacleboy:** backup!!! 

**itssuperman:** thalia! 

**itssuperman:** when did you get here?!? 

**ispeakforthetrees:** ive been lurking

**ispeakforthetrees:** valdez ur on thin ice 

**ispeakforthetrees:** ive only decided to spare you my wrath bc i get to see this chaos 

**badboysupreme:** yeah thats fair, youre a busy woman 

**reyna:** we are all busy

**badboysupreme:** well you are both doing important administrativey things, frank too but he wont mind as much, so im just gonna apologize for causing chaos in your life at this trying time

**frank:** yeah Leo, it’s cool

**reyna:** dont be absurd, this is an entertaining break from logistics of cross-camp exchange programs, so thank you 

**badboysupreme:** wow…. i’m moved

**Islandgetaway:** can confirm, im right next to him

**barnacleboy:** calypso! where have you been!

**Islandgetaway:** here the whole time, just been looking over leo’s shoulder 

**barnacleboy:** so is that everyone? I think that’s everyone but hazel 

**frank:** yeah hazel’s with arion. somewhere in the wilds of america 

**sadiethegreat:** what i am about to do, i do with no regret 

**sadiethegreat:** i had a big speech but it has since disappeared :( 

**sadiethegreat:** **@coolguysdontlookatexplosions** thank you for the idea, i look forward to causing chaos with you 

**coolguysdontlookatexplosions:** same, i feel this will be better than the camel

**sadiethegreat:** ooh yeah

**givemeyourbones:** we do not talk about the camel incident 

**mr.president:** I really doubt we can control them

**givemeyourbones:** i can certainly try

**sadiethegreat:** k, here goes

**_sadiethegreat_** _added_ ** _carter, Ms. Fahrenheit, anotheronebitesthedust,_** _and 3 others to the chat_

**sadiethegreat:** suffer 

**callthemedic:** Sadie. What is this?

**goldmine:** uh oh actual punctuation 

**barnacleboy:** hazel you typed like this until like 2 months ago

**goldmine:** i don’t see how that’s relevant to sadie’s impending demise

**anotheronebitesthedust:** that’s accurate

**badboysupreme:** hazel your name game is … not great today

**goldmine:** alright fine 

**_goldmine_ ** _ changed their name to _ **_thatonehorsegirl_ **

**thatonehorsegirl:** better?

**badboysupreme:** hmm, adequate

**callthemedic:** i demand answers sadie 

**sadiethegreat:** ITS A FUN CHAOTIC GROUP CHAT WHERE WE CAN COMPLAIN ABOUT THE GODS MESSING UP OUR LIVES!

**sadiethegreat:** the rest is just straight up vibing

**coolguysdontlookatexplosions:** sure, but im just vibing

**sadiethegreat:** what, oh yeah, same tbh

**sadiethegreat:** just viBIng

**carter:** sadie your puns are terrible

**badboysupreme:** how dare you say something like that

**badboysupreme:** i think they’re great

**sadiethegreat:** yeah!!! ur my brother now

**badboysupreme:** sweet

**callthemedic:** aight, im out

**_callthemedic_ ** _ has left the chat _

**carter:** me too

**_carter_ ** _ has left the chat _

**sadiethegreat:** NO MERCY FOR YOU

**_sadiethegreat_ ** _ has added  _ **_carter_ ** _ to the chat _

**sadiethegreat:** jaz can only leave bc shes the medic and also I value my life too much to force her to deal with this

**sadiethegreat:** you dont have this excuse

**sadiethegreat:** i guess  **@doctorman** and  **@moralsupport** could leave too if they wanted

**doctorman:** why would i leave? this is free entertainment 

**moralsupport:** i thrive on chaos

**mr.president:** you said that tuesday during free-for-all and immediately died

**Ms.Fahrenheit:** i really hope that was a metaphor 

**theVibeChecker:** nope 

**theVibeChecker:** welcome to hotel valhalla 

**anotheronebitesthedust:** i keep forgetting most of you are dead, that’s why that meet up felt a bit off

**givemeyourbones:** ha same

**givemeyourbones:** the weird vibe has been explained

**sadiethegreat:** I refuse to believe either of you forgot about that 

**givemeyourbones:** and you will never know the truth

**givemeyourbones:** oh hey,  **@anotheronebitesthedust** did you know about that beforehand?

**anotheronebitesthedust:** yeah, vaguely 

**givemeyourbones:** i accidentally shadowtraveled to muspelheim in the early days

**givemeyourbones:** that was a Not Fun way to find out

**itssuperman:** oh hey  **@moralsupport** we should have a rematch sometime, since you pretty much threw it last time

**moralsupport:** you underestimate how bad i am at fighting, i was actually trying there

**carter:** if im stuck here

**sadiethegreat:** you are

**carter:** ive been thinking, and have made some decisions 

**givemeyourbones:** anyone else suddenly apprehensive

**galaxybrain:** relax, it’s carter, it’ll be fine. probably

**carter:** im honored by your faith 

**_carter_ ** _ changed the chat name to “please solve your own problems” _

**_carter_ ** _ changed their name to  _ **_thefalcon_ **

**barnacleboy:** hmm

**theonehorsegirl:** ah, so im not the only one with bad name skills

**thefalcon:** what how does it not make sense

**sadiethegreat:** i hate to admit it but hes right 

**sadiethegreat:** you just probably dont have the right context 

**sadiethegreat:** ah the good old days when i could be a bird

**fashionman:** im sorry what

**galaxybrain:** ok carter’s statement makes sense but that does not

**Ms.Fahrenheit:** because they were the hosts of Horus and Isis they could turn into their sacred animals, a falcon and a kite respectively

**thefalcon:** ah the good old days when I could be a 30 foot tall power ranger

**sadiethegreat:** technically you still can, ur just a coward

**thefalcon:** the gods have gone back to the heavens, we can’t be hosts. use their powers sure, but not like we used to 

**sadiethegreat:** yeah im just hearing that ur a coward

**sadiethegreat:** i for one, do it all the time

**thefalcon:** sadie that’s illegal 

**sadiethegreat:** uh huh, says who?

**sadiethegreat:** you literally MAKE THE LAW

**sadiethegreat:** YOU CAN CHANGE IT IF YOU DONT VIBE WITH IT

**ispeakforthetrees:** OOH  **@doctorman** we may need some assistance 

**moralsupport:** all our lives are so vastly different and so similar in the exact same ways

**kingofnewyork:** you speak the truth

**barnacleboy:** has your life been affected by gods? life changing quests? prophecies bearing the possibility of imminent destruction of all civilization? if so, you may be entitled to compensation! Call this toll free number now!

**galaxybrain:** percy you’re a comedic genius 

**Islandgetaway:** I’m definitely missing something

**kingofnewyork:** on tv there’s a lot of ads about being injured of made ill by working conditions or products, and sometimes there’s court cases about it and people who were affected get money

**Islandgetaway:** oh right, tv is that box where all the tiny people live, 

**moralsupport:** do you not know how the tv works?

**coolguysdontlookatexplosions:** well maggie, i don’t on the best of days. click button, see cartoon, presto changeo

**moralsupport:** yes but the modern century is confusing for time-displaced persons

**givemeyourbones:** hmm,  **@Islandgetaway** and **@thatonehorsegirl** we should start a club

**thatonehorsegirl:** ooh sounds fun!

**Islandgetaway:** yeah sure

**Islandgetaway:** no i do know how the tv works, that was a joke

**Islandgetaway:** mostly

**Islandgetaway:** ive gotten several speedruns through history to catch up, its very entertaining 

**kingofnewyork:** why are all of us… so funny, all the time

**givemeyourbones:** everything’s funny when you’re sleep deprived

**kingofnewyork:** ah very true

**itssuperman:** i believe it’s the desire to have fulfilling lives when there’s the possibility of dying young, at least for demigods

**barnacleboy:** if you bring things called “logic” and “common sense” into this here chat i will find a way to kick you out

**reyna:** yeah jason, didn’t you know better than this 

**itssuperman:** reyna why are you and percy ganging up on me

**kingofnewyork:** would you like another outside opinion

**itssuperman:** yes please piper 

**kingofnewyork:** they are Correct

**badboysupreme:** oh hey, speaking of kicking people *cough* jason *cough* out

**badboysupreme:** which, will not happen as of yet

**barnacleboy:** aww :(

**badboysupreme:** i have executed my great wisdom and given  **@galaxybrain, @reyna, @coolguysdontlookatexplosions** and  **@sadiethegreat** all mod privileges

**galaxybrain:** was that really wise 

**sadiethegreat:** likely not

**badboysupreme:** definitely not

**coolguysdontlookatexplosions:** but it will be super entertaining 

**moralsupport:** … this will not end well

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Handy character name guide in case you were wondering:
> 
> greek/roman  
> badboysupreme - Leo  
> kingofnewyork - piper  
> itssuperman - jason  
> goldmine, thatonehorsegirl - hazel  
> Frank - frank  
> barnacleboy - percy  
> galaxybrain - annabeth  
> Islandgetaway - calypso  
> reyna - reyna  
> givemeyourbones - nico  
> doctorman - will  
> ispeakforthetrees - thalia  
>   
> Norse  
> Maggie, moralsupport - magnus  
> coolguysdontlookatexplosions - alex  
> mr.president - TJ  
> Merida - mallory  
> theROCK - halfborn  
> theVibeChecker- sam  
> fashionman - blitz  
> magicman - hearth
> 
> Egyptian  
> sadiethegreat - sadie  
> carter, thefalcon, kingcarter - carter  
> anotheronebitesthedust - walt/anubis  
> Ms.Fahrenheit - zia  
> callthemedic - jaz 
> 
> This is done purely for my enjoyment, but I’d still love to hear what you think. If you have ideas for what to include, (general chaos causing things, nicknames, interactions, random bits of funny dialogue) I’ll do my best to include it at some point and chances are good that the next update will come sooner.
> 
> Thank you!


	2. who would have the gall to send this?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> to no one's surprise, alex likes to start the day off with a bit of chaos.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi. i'm still here. school's taking up all my energy which leaves little to none for content creation...so...yeah.  
> have fun with this!

**_group chat: please solve your own problems_ **

**[8:37 am]**

**_coolguysdontlookatexplosions_** _changed their_ _name to_ ** _girlsjustwannahavefun_**

**girlsjustwannahavefun:** hey y’all 

**girlsjustwannahavefun:** who wants to see some epic fails

**barnacleboy:** are they about me?

**girlsjustwannahavefun:** i have not yet caught you failing on camera

**kingofnewyork:** sounds interesting 

**kingofnewyork:** im in

**girlsjustwannahavefun:** brace yourselves

**_girlsjustwannahavefun_ ** _ changed chat name  _ **_“please solve your own problems”_ ** _ to _ **_“Hotel Valhalla Smack Cam and Blooper Reel”_ **

**girlsjustwannahavefun:** buckle in folks

**girlsjustwannahavefun:** you're in for a wild ride

**_group chat: it has been 6 days since our last incident_ **

**[12:26 pm]**

**doctorman:** so

**doctorman:** are we going to tell them we have our own chat where we go over the stupid stuff our friends do???

**callthemedic:** never

**doctorman:** or do we want to go the inside joke route

**doctorman:** oh sure

**moralsupport:** im on board

**moralsupport:** fyi hearth knows

**moralsupport:** he won’t say anything 

**doctorman:** … was that a pun

**moralsupport:** oh dang, i meant that in the sharing information sense

**moralsupport:** but also yes, yes it was

**doctorman:** this is getting boring

**moralsupport:** wait what

**moralsupport:** im confused

**moralsupport:** have you seen the main chat?

**moralsupport:** its pure and utter chaos

**moralsupport:** ive been living in fear ever since alex started his smack cam thing

**moralsupport:** ive gotten smacked off a cliff by mallory twice so far

**_doctorman_** _has changed their name to_ **_chaoswrangler_**

**moralsupport:** oh nice

**chaoswrangler:** it was getting simple

**callthemedic:** im terribly sorry guys but

**_callthemedic_ ** _ changed chat name  _ **_“it has been 6 days since our last incident”_ ** _ to _ **_“it has been 0 days since our last incident”_ **

**callthemedic:** i don’t make the rules

**moralsupport:** oof

**chaoswrangler:** i was really hoping we’d get up to double digits

**chaoswrangler:** but alas

**callthemedic:** yeah one of the younger kids decided to rock climb Thoth’s statue

**callthemedic:** they didn’t get very far, but they now have a broken wrist

**moralsupport:** ...ouch

**chaoswrangler:** can i get an f in the chat?

**moralsupport:** f

**call the medic:** f 

**_group chat: Hotel Valhalla Smack Cam and Blooper Reel_ **

**[12:35 am]**

**badboysupreme:** anonymously submitted poll question!

**badboysupreme:** poll 1: who makes good shadow puppets

**itssuperman:** really?

**thatonehorsegirl:** sometimes?

**kingofnewyork:** leo why’re you doing this

**givemeyourbones:** no

**givemeyourbones:** i physically cannot

**badboysupreme:** for funsies :)

**givemeyourbones:** if you see it let me know, its been on the run for a week

**reyna:** sounds vexing

**reyna:** i for one, am too sophisticated for such things

**barnacleboy:** SURE jan 

**itssuperman:** yeah, I have video evidence 

**reyna:** not anymore you don’t

**badboysupreme:** MOVING ON

**badboysupreme:** poll 2: What is the  _ weirdest  _ thing you’ve ever heard someone say?

**barnacleboy:** i think chiron said once that god was real??? or at least implied it really hard, and deflected like it was an olympic sport

**chaoswrangler:** can we please...all go to bed….

**givemeyourbones:** absolutely Not

**moralsupport:** apparently Thor tried to fight Jesus once, so yeah, that checks out

**mr.president:** look it’s this big thing, like everyone in HV who died before 900 ce (I think??? probably earlier too???) is SUPER bitter about the whole Anno Domini thing, so DONT mention AD here, use ce and dont get yourselves stabbed

**ispeakforthetrees:** its all about the Belief™ my dudes

**sadiethegreat:** wait does this mean

**sadiethegreat:** if i got enough ppl to believe in me...

**sadiethegreat:** I could become a god?

**callthemedic:** dO NOT

**barnacleboy:** if god’s real, tell him to stay out of my life, i don’t need more deities messing with it

**galaxybrain:** im 99% sure chiron also implied that god literally would not do anything that one time, and would let you do your own thing

**galaxybrain:** there’s that whole “free will” “garden of eden” “snakes are evil” thing that christians always go on about

**galaxybrain:** the bible was pretty heavy on the “you make your own choices, and have to live with the consequences”, at least from what I got from it

**moralsupport:** wait annabeth, youve read the BIBLE?

**galaxybrain:** yeah, I was bored and wanted to see what christians were constantly freaking out about

**galaxybrain:** I’m honestly still quia bit confused 

**kingofnewyork:** oKAY, WE’RE STOPPING HERE, BECAUSE THANKS LEO, I HAVE NO DESIRE TO HAVE A CRISIS AT THREE AM

**[9:57 am]**

**kingofnewyork:** wait will, why did you change your name 

**barnacleboy:** yeah and why to THAT

**chaoswrangler:** because you lot have a varying number of brain cells and annabeth, reyna and i are in possession of quite a few of them, while the rest are devoted to a worrying amount of chaos

**kingofnewyork:** that’s valid 

**barnacleboy:** id be offended if it wasn’t true some of the time

**chaoswrangler:** im not counting how much time it is

**galaxybrain:** youre smart percy, you just have… interesting ideas sometimes

**barnacleboy:** ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

**barnacleboy:** i shall endeavor to not skateboard down the lava wall again

**reyna:** this is literally what she means

**barnacleboy:** to be fair, jason was planning on catching us

**badboysupreme:** next time you attempt a piggyback-jetpack thing, please let me see it

**barnacleboy:** but unfortunately 

**barnacleboy:** no one expects the blackjack

**itssuperman:** oh That

**itssuperman:** it was pretty cool

**ispeakforthetrees:** i knew something was off

**ispeakforthetrees:** next time im joining no take backs 

**galaxybrain:** oh gods

**ispeakforthetrees:** chill annie, i can’t die unless im killed

**galaxybrain:** yes… exactly….

**barnacleboy:** eh we’ll be fine

**ispeakforthetrees:** i only allow a certain Quality™ of shenanigans

**galaxybrain:** this is … literally what i meant

**galaxybrain:** like you and jason’s series of ridiculous duels 

**kingofnewyork:** OH HEY PERCY

**barnacleboy:** PIPER

**kingofnewyork:** can i interest you in taking my name

**barnacleboy:** oH? MAWWIDGE? 

**barnacleboy:** sorry no :(

**kingofnewyork:** my screen name, doof

**kingofnewyork:** i simply do not vibe with it any longer, and have come up with one i like better, and think you would appreciate it more than me

**barnacleboy:** id be absolutely honored

**kingofnewyork:** great its yours

**_kingofnewyork_** _changed their name to_ **_pipinghot_**

**_barnacleboy_ ** _ changed their name to _ **_kingofnewyork_ **

**reyna:** nice 

**pipinghot:** thank you

**itssuperman:** accurate

**itssuperman:** oh hi reyna!

**badboysupreme:** ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

**reyna:** let me be bisexual in peace and appreciate my pretty friends

**badboysupreme:** okay fair

**chaoswrangler:** i relate to that

**kingofnewyork:** HELL YEAH!

**kingofnewyork:** thank YOU PIPER

**moralsupport:** oh hey :) 

**moralsupport:** mallory :)

**moralsupport:** ive thought up my revenge for the THIRD time you’ve smacked me off a cliff :)

**Merida:** NO

**moralsupport:** yes

**moralsupport:** also consider this revenge for beantown AND telling annabeth about it

**_moralsupport_ ** _ changed  _ **_Merida’s_ ** _ name to  _ **_MACK_ **

**moralsupport:** suffer

**MACK:** I am going to kill you

**girlsjustwannahavefun:** aaaaaand he’s dead

**thefalcon:** aren’t you worried about your boyfriend?

**girlsjustwannahavefun:** nah

**girlsjustwannahavefun:** he’ll be fine in like three hours

**girlsjustwannahavefun:** besides its nothing much compared to how we met

**badboysupreme:** now i really want to know how you met

**thefalcon:** and i really  _ don’t _

**girlsjustwannahavefun:** **@badboysupreme** i will gladly oblige

**girlsjustwannahavefun:** first i ran him over (i was a cheetah at the time), and then for our first actual face to face meeting, i cut off his head

**kingofnewyork:** that sounds a bit concerning

**badboysupreme:** wow

**girlsjustwannahavefun:** oh don’t worry, it was to save him from possession from my terrible father

**kingofnewyork:** that almost makes it worse

**theVibeChecker:** oh wait until you hear the full story of the Banana Boat

**girlsjustwannahavefun:** yeah!

**girlsjustwannahavefun:** i miss pottery barn :(

**the falcon:** the store?

**girlsjustwannahavefun:** no my animated clay friend 

**mr.president:** ah that time i almost died

**theVibeChecker:** im just really thinking about how magnus basically got into a rap battle with loki and won

**badboysupreme:** what!

**badboysupreme:** that’s so cool!

**kingofnewyork:** how did he win though

**girlsjustwannahavefun:** get this

**girlsjustwannahavefun:** by the power of friendship

**thefalcon:** wow

**girlsjustwannahavefun:** yeah I swear maggie is like an anime character at this point

**girlsjustwannahavefun:** he’s got the weird magical/supernatural inheritance, funky weapon (talking sword), magic powers, high propensity for trouble, wacky adventures… the list goes on

**kingofnewyork:** wait that’s literally me

**kingofnewyork:** with the exception of a pen sword instead of a talking sword, but that’s me!

**theVibeChecker:** your sword is actually a pen

**kingofnewyork:** yes, and yes i can write with it

**theVibeChecker:** i need to tell magnus, that’s hilarious, especially since (apparently) magnus had suggested that, and jack thought it was a ridiculous idea

**kingofnewyork:** jack?

**theVibeChecker:** the talking sword

**girlsjustwannahavefun:** i dont actually think  _ you _ are an anime character 

**kingofnewyork:** ???

**girlsjustwannahavefun:** you have more of a “protagonist of a ya book series” vibe

**kingofnewyork:** cool, but why that in particular?

**girlsjustwannahavefun:** the aforementioned traits but especially a) wacky adventures 

**girlsjustwannahavefun:** b) excessive sarcasm when you shouldn’t

**girlsjustwannahavefun:** and c) objectively, i just think you’re cooler

**kingofnewyork:** oh thanks!

**galaxybrain:** as a person who went on much of those wacky adventures, can confirm, that is accurate

**moralsupport:** i had the feeling you were roasting me and i was RIGHT

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the chapter title is indeed a phantom of the opera reference, particularly concerning the three am section, which was based off of me thinking about this at the wee hours of 'i should really be in bed now'. 
> 
> please let me know what you thought, and if you have anything you'd like to see! it'll help me get this out quicker! thanks <3
> 
> i'm only going over the changed names, because there's too many otherwise.  
> alex - coolguysdontlookatexplosions -> girlsjustwannahavefun  
> will - doctorman -> chaoswrangler  
> piper - kingofnewyork -> pipinghot  
> percy - barnacleboy -> kingofnewyork  
> mallory - Merida -> MACK


	3. mamma mia, here we go again

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> annabananabeth added MangoMan, mabby, bothew, and Frederick Chase to the group chat “mamma mia, here we go again”
> 
> [7:51 pm]
> 
> annabananabeth: right
> 
> annabananabeth: so i don’t know what is going on anymore
> 
> annabananabeth: and quite frankly i am not going to try to explain

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the chase family group chat! this will likely show up again in the future, as i like the idea of all the cousins interacting. i hope you like it.
> 
> kinda a prologue for the rest of the fic? but not really. if you'd like, check out the second work in this series, trouble making everything alright, as some parts in the second half might not make as much sense, but you'll probably be fine. thank you for reading!

**_annabananabeth_ ** _ added _ **_MangoMan, mabby, bothew,_ ** _ and _ **_Frederick Chase_ ** _ to the group chat  _ **_“mamma mia, here we go again”_ **

**[7:51 pm]**

**annabananabeth:** right

**annabananabeth:** so i don’t know what is going on anymore

**annabananabeth:** and quite frankly i am not going to try to explain

**Frederick Chase:** what is this?

**mabby:** dad change your name

**Frederick Chase:** okay?

**Frederick Chase:** what do I change it to? why is my name not acceptable?

**mabby:** _‘acceptable’_

**bothew:** because its boring

**Frederick Chase:** if you insist

**_Frederick Chase_ ** _ changed their name to  _ **_local pilot_ **

**bothew:** adequate

**mabby:** wait  **@MangoMan** who are you???

**MangoMan:** uh

**MangoMan:** let me talk to my lawyer

**MangoMan:** **@annabananabeth** help

**annabananabeth:** no :)

**_annabananabeth_ ** _ changed  _ **_MangoMan’s_ ** _ name to  _ **_beantown_ **

**beantown:** ANNABETH CHASE.

**beantown:** ARE YOU AND MALLORY CONSPIRING AGAINST ME?

**annabananabeth:** yes, obviously, why would you ask?

**localpilot:** one of you please explain what’s going on

**annabananabeth:** alright  **@beantown** go

**beantown:** ugh fine

**beantown:** hi im magnus chase

**bothew:** what

**mabby:** didn’t you die

**bothew:** aren't you dead

**localpilot:** Matthew!

**beantown:** yes

**beantown:** i got better

**bothew:** cool

**localpilot:** Magnus, how?

**beantown:** uh

**beantown: @annabananabeth** can i?

**annabananabeth:** yes, they’re in the loop

**beantown:** right. so. you know how randolph was kinda crazy, super into collecting norse artifacts and had all those ‘sources’ how the center of the universe was boston and thats what the vikings were looking for?

**beantown:** thing is, he was Not Wrong

**beantown:** so when i died on the bridge, a thing that DID happen, a valkyrie (her name is sam! she’s super cool!) thought i was heroic and stuff, and took me to valhalla where i physically cant die, which is REALLY trippy to think about, found out im a demigod (thanks frey), and we went on a quest, fought a sea snake, a giant, met thor, killed a different giant, and tied up a wolf

**beantown:** it was a disaster and apparently odin is like the equivalent of an influencer/motivational speaker that everyone tolerates bc he’s super powerful, but dont tell him that

**annabananabeth:** giants?

**beantown:** i assure you. Not The Same

**annabananabeth:** good

**beantown:** there’s more than that, but that’s pretty much how i got stuck in this mess

**annabananabeth:** ah yes the wiggles t-shirt

**beantown:** no. stop.

**bothew:** so can you literally not die

**beantown:** no I can die, just not in valhalla

**beantown:** like a video game! 

**beantown:** in certain areas I’ll respawn, in others, it’s game over 

**annabananabeth:** like wreck it ralph

**beantown:** yeah that

**localpilot:** I am glad you are all right. If anything else happens, please let us know. Or at least let Annabeth know.

**annabananabeth:** yeah and then we can get things done much quicker 

**beantown:** i don’t know if I’ll take you up on that because I don’t want to involve you in my mess

**beantown:** like, you have a whole mess of your own to deal with 

**beantown:** but thanks you guys

**mabby:** hm

**beantown:** ...should i be worried?

**annabananabeth:** yeah probably

**bothew:** yes excellent idea

**localpilot:** did you two somehow gain telepathy when i wasn’t looking?

**bothew:** yes

**mabby:** yes

**annabananabeth:** you’re in the same room, aren’t you?

**mabby:** -_-

**bothew:** anyways  **@beantown,** if you get any interesting trouble, hit us up 

**bothew:** sadie’s probably gonna find it hilarious if its not actively world ending

**beantown:** who is sadie?

**annabananabeth:** i can introduce you at some point later, but we are NOT going there today.

**mabby:** fine but can we go back to thor? hello?

**beantown:** not chris hemsworthy

**mabby:** my hopes are ruined

**beantown:** actually, my dad (frey) could probably pass as his body double

**bothew:** ok that's cool

**bothew:** did you get like, any cool powers? overdramatic seems like a thing the gods would do

**annabananabeth:** i hate how accurate that is

**beantown:** alas no

**beantown:** i can heal people and also disarm people around me?

**beantown:** which is nice, but like, not helpful when i cant fight to save my life

**beantown:** literally

**mabby:** oof, good luck with that

**beantown:** thanks! I’ll try not to die as much as i can

**bothew:** that’s the spirit!

**_group chat: mamma mia, here we go again_ **

**[10:45 pm]**

**beantown:** **@annabananabeth**

 **beantown:** **@annabananabeth**

 **beantown:** **@annabananabeth**

 **beantown:** **@annabananabeth**

 **beantown:** **@annabananabeth**

**annabananabeth:** magnus, what’s wrong that you’re doing this at midnight?

**beantown:** what’s the worst news you’ve gotten recently?

**bothew:** jeSUIS CHRIST magnus you can’t just say that!

**annabananabeth:** you spelled that je suis

**bothew:** I Am Aware and it Was Intentional

**annabananabeth:** ok fair

**annabananabeth:** wait what are you doing up 

**bothew:** some of the ankle biters blew something up, so now half of brooklyn house is either on fire or covered in glitter

**annabananabeth:** so where’s matthew then?

**bothew:** oh he’s still sleeping, he was in the glitter half

**beantown:** annabeth

**beantown:** answer the question. im serious

**annabananabeth:** okay? i guess?

**annabananabeth:** not doing great on the english section of the ACT

**annabananabeth:** thanks dyslexia

**bothew:** rip

**beantown:** oh thank god

**annabanabeth:** ok now im even more worried whats wrong

**bothew:** uh oh, she’s not using proper punctuation

**annabanabeth:** YEAH, because im legitimately WORRIED now

**beantown:** you can calm down, i swear everything is fine

**annabananabeth:** hold that thought

**annabananabeth:** chiron’s calling me

**annabananabeth:** he doesn’t do that unless there’s an emergency

**beantown:** no no no

**bothew:** uh?

**beantown:** oh god this is bad

**bothew:** why

**beantown:** because she’s going to go through a rollercoaster of grief in the next five minutes and i was hoping to avoid this

**annabananabeth:** ...

**annabananabeth:** jason’s dead

**bothew:** WHAT

**beantown:** HE’S NOT, I SWEAR

**annabananabeth:** explain. now.

**beantown:** right, so you know how generally our worlds, greek/norse/egyptian, are supposed to stay separate?

**beantown:** yeah, sometimes that Does Not happen and we wind up with a situation like to day

**annabananabeth:** how is THIS supposed to help when my friend is DEAD???

**annabananabeth:** this is just like seeing YOU all over again!

**beantown:** i know this and i am sorry

**beantown:** short version: jason ended up in valhalla due to a mix up and thanks to trial by combat and odin’s lack of desire to deal with hades? and paperwork, jason got to go back to life since he ended up in the wrong place, and they’re just gonna. not tell anyone he died.

**annabananabeth:** i. okay

**annabananabeth:** give me five minutes, i've got to confirm something

**beantown:** of course

**bothew:** wow you were right that gave me emotional whiplash and i didn’t even know the guy

**beantown:** yeah

**annabananabeth:** ok good news, i can rest easy and believe you

**beantown:** you didn’t?

**annabananabeth:** there was some DOUBT, okay? but i called nico and he said everything’s been sorted out, or will be soon enough. jason’s fine and going back to new rome with reyna and piper (and leo, who was there apparently)

**beantown:** nico?

**annabananabeth:** hades’ son. kind of an ambassador of the dead, it's a bit complicated. anyways, nico says jason’s alive and staying that way. luckily for us, whatever thing is involved transferring dead souls is such a hassle that hades doesn’t want to do it either, and letting him go back to being alive is the easiest solution for some reason. i'm not complaining, it’s just weird. it’ll be like a hazel situation, where he forgets it wasn’t supposed to happen, and we all go on with our lives

**beantown:** a hazel situation?

**bothew:** yeah im lost too

**bothew:** don’t you have a friend named hazel?

**annabananabeth:** yes

**annabananabeth:** long story short: you’re not the only (ex)dead person i know. jason will be the third

**beantown:** WHAT

**annabananabeth:** nico found out that he had a sister (child of pluto) who’d died in like the thirties, i'm not sure, i’ve not asked her, seems very personal. this was at the time that the doors of death were open, so the veil between the living and the dead was weird. yes, it is related to the extremely traumatic story i told you. 

**annabananabeth:** nico was looking for his OTHER sister (biological, also child of hades). couldn’t find her since she’d chosen to be reborn. he saw hazel and decided ‘if i can’t get my sister, the least i can do is help another of my siblings,’ and basically jailbroke her out of the underworld

**annabananabeth:** hades knows, but like can turn a blind eye since she was one of the seven of the super important prophecy that stopped the end of the world 

**bothew:** wow, do we just like, have a notapocalypse every few years?

**beantown:** probably

**annabananabeth:** if we do i do not want to know about it

**beantown:** ok my turn for the long version

**beantown:** im at dinner. two new kids show up. both are confused, and one just looks a cross between exhausted and exasperated.

**annabananabeth:** jason

**beantown:** yep

**beantown:** anyways, he gets his fortune read, the norns appear with that prophecy you told me about, and meanwhile im thinking “this is extremely weird, because annabeth told be about a prophecy, and while my memory is Not Great, im pretty sure it had a sense of ‘the world is ending’ and there was a guy named jason involved.” so this is tracking pretty well to what you told me

**beantown:** he then stands up and is like “hey im not actually supposed to be here so yeah” which causes a whole mess, odin appears while making the WINDOWS START UP SOUND like WHY, SERIOUSLY. and decides that jason’s entrance to valhalla was messed with, so he can duel someone to get out if he wins. 

**beantown:** so the thanes (the annoying mostly-assholes who run valhalla) set up a draw to choose a random opponent from the people in the hall. its absolutely absurd because most of these people have been here for years, training to the death. literally

**beantown:** AND GUESS WHO GETS PICKED

**annabananabeth:** you

**beantown:** ME, WHO IS TERRIBLE AT DUELS. i swear, its always me at this point and i've been here for less than a year

**beantown:** jason wins obviously and i don’t die, because he spared my life like a decent person, and thanes decide that super noble or whatever, and then he goes back to being alive and i get to finish my steve the potato

**bothew:** steve the potato?

**annabananabeth:** what?

**beantown:** inside joke, it's not important

**beantown:** so yeah, that’s that, alex is going to think this is hilarious for the next ten years probably, but that's fine

**annabananabeth:** because i need something to distract me from this mess, i’m literally shaking right now, alex! how is he?

**beantown:** he’s great! same as ever, weaponizing pottery and all. i have to say tho, it is still SUPER weird that someone actually wants to date me. like, i’d literally never really thought of it before? but i love him so everything works out

**annabananabeth:** awww <3

**beantown:** wait no don’t tell him i said that

**bothew:** you’re safe. for now.

**beantown:** oh thank god

**bothew:** only because i don't have his number

**beantown:** oh i’m doomed then

**annabananabeth:** hey, speaking of getting people’s numbers, magnus would any of your friends be up to hang out sometime?

**beantown:** to do what? cause minor mayhem and complain about the messes that are our lives?

**annabananabeth:** yes

**beantown:** always

**bothew:** is this the thing you were talking to sadie and carter about?

**annabananabeth:** it is indeed.

**annabananabeth:** get back to me with some dates that’ll work and we can meet up in new york sometime. i assume you have some way to get around quickly?

**beantown:** uhhh, we’ll probably have to use the department store portals which is an Ordeal, but yeah

**annabananabeth:** i’m sorry what???

**beantown:** just trust me, you don’t want to know

**annabananabeth:** okay? anyways, i’m going to call percy about this before i start freaking out again, so goodnight everyone!

**beantown:** goodnight!

**bothew:** goodnight!

**beantown:** you gonna go to bed?

**bothew:** are you kidding me?

**bothew:** sadie just accidentally covered the half of brooklyn house that’s on fire in what looks like elephant toothpaste and now the ankle biters are running around like headless chickens covered in glitter because one of them (shelby, probably) figured out how to fly and taught the rest of them so now it’s complete pandemonium. i’m breaking out the popcorn.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so this chat was actually the original idea that i had for this fic. it was going to start with this and then evolve into the other chat like in the previous chapters, but obviously that didn't happen. thanks for reading, and as always, if there's anything you liked about this chapter or would like to see in future chapters, let me know! i love all the support <3


End file.
